---

I've never been this scared in my life, never. This is a very uncomfortable decision, scared the shit outta me. But man... when you always aim higher every time you got that opportunity window... that shit will change you into an addict. You'll get addicted to be a better person, widen your perspectives, put yourself first, take really good care of your hopes and dreams, even with a small progress, you'll get there eventually somehow.

Even from time to time I can be a very hot-headed, stubborn and a bitter person, I'm fully aware that I deserves to be happy. With my own terms and my own way. I don't give a single fuck about what other people trying to tell me what to do, fuck it.

My life in the past ten years flash before my eyes, with this particular song from The Brandals. That's what I've been feeling towards Jakarta. Especially in the South area. I can bring you to the most exciting hangout places, or even an awesome burger joint. And if you fancy for some street community, I definitely can give you that.

This love-hate relationship between me and this city is so sickening. I'm just too fed up, but hey... we did our best to get along past ten years anyway. So I raise my glass tonight for this.

My daily journal packed on the suitcase already, too much effort to do this in a conventional way, so here I am... ranting out my fears and concerns and nonsense so all of you can read these. Sorry not sorry, but I don't know what else to do until my flight tomorrow.

I don't know, man... life's funny isn't it? And I'm dead fucking serious right now, this is scared the shit outta me. Ha.

The last night being a Jakartans.
Mpokgaga out.